Despite all accumulated evidence to the contrary, I’m actually a very simple creature. Many little things contribute to my happiness on a regular basis, even when I’m THISCLOSE to going on a rage bender. F’rinstance:
- Dragonflies and damselflies
- Coke Zero, preferably from the fountain
- Husky and Malamute puppies, the fatter and floofier the better
- Weird Al Yankovic
- Heath bars, or Skor bars if Heath bars are unavailable for some reason
- Gordon Ramsay in short bursts
- Ferrets (or any mustelids in a pinch)
- Alligators (or any crocodilians in a pinch)
- Homemade beef stew, or homemade pork stew
- The VeggieTales Jonah movie
- Rhythm of the Night by DeBarge
- Generic Lucky Charms in a big bag in bed with me
- Star Trek: The Next Generation, Season One
- Herod’s Song from Jesus Christ Superstar
- The Bean Thing
- Drunk, fat raccoons
- Cadbury Mini Eggs by the sack (NOT the big ones with the yolk, the little solid chocolate ones)
- Sea Island Cotton flavored everything from Bath & Body Works
- Pierogies
- Birds of prey
There are a ton of other happy-making things, but these are some of the top ones, many of which are totally free because they come from God.
Seriously. Alligators are totally free, you guys. How awesome is that? PTL!